Our family is SO enjoying our summer. We’re visiting metro parks, playing in the mud kitchen, and taking lots of naps. I’m also newly an auntie- which is such a beautiful joy seeing my sweet sis be an incredible mama.
In one week I’ll have my 1st reconstruction surgery, which is replacing my expanders with implants. Before I was diagnosed with breast cancer, I had no idea what expanders were. If you’re curious, they are temporary silicone spheres that keep your skin stretched out. They don’t hurt constantly, but I’m never not aware of these foreign bodies in my body. They poke and pinch and I can’t wait to be rid of them. I also haven’t been able to wear the twins in a carrier for a year, and that breaks my mama heart.
I can’t wait for the surgery, but so sad that I won’t be lifting the twins for a month. I seriously couldn’t have married a better man. He’s so in tune with the kids and it’s so incredible having a partner that shares in the load, often unequally. It hurts that he’s had to honor “in sickness and in health” so early in our marriage.
I’m still dealing with side effects of chemotherapy and immunotherapy, but I have a year’s worth of hair growth! It’s curly and wild and a weird mullet length but it’s so much better than being bald.
Dealing with cancer emotionally is a giant mess. I’m so thankful for the present but so disappointed in all I’ve lost and all that has changed. Searching for new purpose and discovering old dreams…the brain fog, the sadness, the joy, the pain; all mixed together.
My family and my faith continue to sustain me. God is good, even in the trials. True joy exists in loving others and being loved well, regardless of circumstance.
Happy summer friends!
