I wanted to write an extra special thank you to the Friends of Berlin Performing Arts (Michael’s school’s performing arts booster program) for feeding our family the week leading up to Under The Lights! They provided a meal Monday- Sunday and Rachel delivered it to our home every night. Our kids loved our dinner drop off!
It was appreciated so much, as I was really feeling the effects of chemo #1. Also, Michael was working late each night so it was so nice that dinner was ready for him at the school and I had the energy to play with the kids and not worry about dinner.
Our community is wrapping us in love and we appreciate so much! 💙🐻🩵
Yesterday was such a busy day. It started with such gorgeous snow falling down as we left home.
We had to be downtown at an OSU medical building at 8am for an abdominal ultrasound to check the functions of my liver, kidneys, pancreas, and gallbladder to ensure everything is working correctly after chemo treatment #1. Constantly being a patient is wearing on me.
Then, we quickly headed over to the Stefanie Speilman facility for chemo #2. Every chemo day is the same routine: I do the routine blood draw, the nurse gets the iv ready, we meet with my doctor to confirm all levels are okay, and then we’re moved into our own private room for the actual chemo infusion part. Yesterday I needed a light and funny movie so I picked 50 First Dates. The actual infusion lasted the entirety of the movie and then we were done. I’m so thankful for everyone’s prayers. There weren’t any complications. Emotionally it’s still hard, and physically it isn’t fun, but I’ve made it through 2 infusions! 💪🏼
Then, we were able to get a quick lunch and head to St. Ann’s maternal fetal medicine clinic for an appointment. These appointments make me so nervous. I try not to wait for bad news, but it always seems like we have a few good, even great, appointments, and then something else comes up. The babies fluid amniotic levels are amazing, measuring about 4.5 cm, and they are both weighing in at 1 1b 13 oz. However, my doctor found something else to be precautious about.
He noticed the blood flow in their brains aren’t equal, similar to what happened to their amniotic fluid levels about a month and a half ago. This can be the start of another syndrome, called TAPS. He wants to see me back in a week to quickly check the blood flow in their brains. It’s always something with these 2 babies! I learned that moms of fraternal twins don’t have to deal with any of these circumstances in the womb, so moms of identical twins are extra tough! These babies are going to need some toughness from me whenever they get here. I’m praying for the physical strength to make it to the end of January, and that the babies would stay put until then to avoid any NICU stays.
Our big kiddos are doing well. It hurts I can’t be more active with them, but they know how much they are loved. We are thankful for both sets of parents and my sister who do so much around the house and still have time to play with the kids. They love it.
We are keeping the faith, even though it’s hard. 💕
I’m going to use this post to discuss Michael’s end of year show, called Under the Lights! Very few people know the labor and preparation it takes to put on this show, especially if you aren’t local. I’m extremely proud, so I want everyone to get a sneak peek of our “November normal” every year.
This show involves the students playing every single song they have played for the season, which is usually around 20 songs. Keep in mind, the students have these completely memorized and somehow remember what they learned starting in July.
Michael has always envisioned this to be more than a typical concert experience. The bright lights, the students’ energy, the moving around aisles and on and off the stage- it all creates an immersive experience. The original idea (even back from his time at Fredericktown) comes back to our experience in the Johnstown band with their annual, “Varsity Show,” but Michael certainly has elevated it after running his own show for 12 seasons.
Most people don’t know, but Michael has turned into a master wood worker and lights extraordinaire. His imagination never ceases to amaze me. So many people can have a vision and dream, but it takes true talent and skill to make it come alive. He works on all the pieces the audience sees, making the lights and effects blend perfectly. It takes him about 2 weeks working late nights (always coming home for dinner to see the kids) to set it all up. Believe it or not, the kids have only 3-4 rehearsals to put it all together. That is impressive!
So many others make this possible, and we are so grateful! The band booster parents who help decorate, sell tickets, and provide food, the students who paint and prep scenery, and his colleagues that collaborate and do all the other behind the scenes things. We are always so thankful for you!
If you attended, you saw the energy and excitement on the students’ faces. I can’t even think back to a time when I had that much energy. I love that they are all having fun, and making life long memories. The care they have for each other is so special, and I know they are building friends to last. I wanted to say a big thank you to all who attended! I hope you saw the energy and hard work and now understand the incredible work it takes from everyone! We hope this tradition lives on, and lasts for years to come!
Check out some pictures from this year, and from past Under the Lights, from 2023-2018. 🎶🐻
Today I went for another scan with my high risk maternal fetal medicine doctor. The babies were moving and kicking like crazy, which is always so comforting to me.
I’m 24 weeks along. Both babies are weighing about 1 lb 5oz each and their fluid levels are looking good! Baby A has 5.5 cm of fluid and Baby B has 4.5. If you’ve read a previous post about the babies, you know that we are watching their fluid levels very carefully to determine that we do not have Twin to Twin Transfusion Syndrome. Today’s ultrasounds show that their fluid levels are evening out, and that both babies are healthy. Hallelujah! Thank you to everyone who has been thinking about us and praying, specifically for the safety of the twins.
I am starting to feel some effects of my 1st chemo last week. Mostly fatigue, but also some major heartburn and mouth sores. I’m thankful it’s nothing worse yet. I’m still dreading my hair falling out, but I have it for now. Michael, my mom, and my sister have been taking over almost everything around the house so I can rest, and I’m so thankful. We’ve also received lots of food, which is a lifesaver!
Next week is Olentangy Berlin Band’s big indoor show called “Under the Lights!”. If you are local, we’d love for you to join us! Our kiddos wear ear protection, but they love the lights and the sounds and the fun spectacle. It’s a fun family event!
Thanks to everyone following along! We are so thankful for this community we have lifting us up! 💕
I conquered the first day of chemo! It certainly wasn’t fun but it was fine. Everyone was so kind and I felt so respected and valued with each encounter with every doctor and nurse. Michael made me laugh most of the day. I also got my wig so I’m ready when I need it. I’m tired, and nervous about the days to come, but I’m grateful I can do this even though it hurts.
I made it in time for trick or treating with the kids! It rained the moment we finished, so all in all it was a great night. I’m ending the night by sitting and feeling tons of baby kicks, so I love this sweet little reminder that the babies are okay and God is taking care of them. 💕
Today I had a heart ultrasound to make sure my heart is strong enough for chemo. Thursday is the big day. I’d love to hear from others about the best things to bring to chemo. Snacks? A tablet? I’ll probably bring my laptop to work a little bit and start preparing for parent teacher conferences in a week. Only teachers know the hours of prep that takes.
I’ve been told I’ll only have 2-3 more weeks with my hair. It’s hard to think about, so I’m trying not to dwell on it. I have a feeling I’ll be having lots of conversations about hair with C. I know she will have a lot of questions, and my hope is to put her at ease and not scare her. I’m afraid I’ll be too scared to look at myself without hair, so I know it’ll be so hard for the kids.
To celebrate the last few weeks with my own hair, we did a family fall photo shoot yesterday. The kids did amazing and the weather was perfect. I can’t wait to share photos as soon as they are back. I think it’s important we document this moment; plus it’s our last photo shoot as a family of 4.
Today I made so many appointments- to meet with my surgeon again, to get a consult with plastics for reconstruction after surgery, and genetics testing to determine what genes I have that could have possibly brought this cancer about.
Please pray for my first chemo session on Thursday. The research I’ve done says most people feel worse on days 3 and 4 after chemo, so I’m hoping to work Friday. It’s so hard to plan, essentially impossible, which is frustrating for a planner like me. I just have to wait and see how my body reacts.
Of course we’re sad and frustrated, but we continue to take it one day at a time. We pray that God has got this, and that these trials will bring joy on the other side.
Until then, I’m finding joy in the smallest things: H’s incredible laugh, C’s smartness and helpfulness, a husband who makes me laugh despite our situation, the gorgeous fall colors, a perfect cup of coffee, and finding out we have so many people supporting us. I’m just blown away. I have so much to grateful for.
Last Thursday we met with Zangmeister Cancer Center and got everything set up. On Monday and Tuesday, we met with OSU The James Cancer experts to get a 2nd opinion due to my highly critical case. We want to trust doctors, but when 3 lives are at risk, it’s hard. We ultimately decided to pursue my treatment with OSU at The James. They have the Stefanie Spielman Breast Cancer Center full of everything I’ll need over the next year. There is still a lot unknowns, but here’s the basic plan we are looking at.
1. Chemo from now until 2 weeks before delivering the babies.
2. Delivery of the babies around 37 weeks (end of January)
3. More chemo (a different, stronger kind that I can’t get now while pregnant)
4. Mastectomy surgery
5. Radiation
We are asking for lots of prayers, for everything. For the health of the babies, our sweet kids who need me, for healing, for Michael, for our parents and my sister Heather who will be helping us tremendously and picking up the pieces as we go on this journey.
Thanks for following along. We appreciate not being alone and being surrounded by lots of love and help.
On top of us being so concerned about the twins, this pregnancy has been terrible on my asthma. Michael had taken me to the ER on September 12 and September 26 because my wheezing and breathing were so bad. Both times I received lots of breathing treatments, a shot of steroids, and a steroid prescription to get me through the week and was in the ER for 2-2.5 hours max each time.
However, Monday 10/7, was different. I could barely take a breath. By the time I got to the ER, my oxygen levels were in the high 70s and I was considered hypoxic. The doctor team immediately said that I would have to be admitted to the hospital to determine the cause of all of these problems this month. Of course, I just wanted a quick fix and to go home, but it wasn’t an option.
I was rushed to St. Ann’s via ambulance and admitted for the night. I was given lots of breathing treatments, multiple rounds of steroids via IV, and I was on constant oxygen. Poor Michael slept on the chair in the hospital and Cindi took care of the kids at home.
I ended up staying all day Tuesday and Tuesday night and was released Wednesday around dinner time.
Although no perfect cause was found, the doctors gave me a long term asthma controller (which I didn’t have) and the pulmonologist discovered I could possibly have an aspirin allergy. My OB told me to take a low dose aspirin each day to lower my chances of high blood pressure with this pregnancy. I started taking that in early September, and that is when my asthma started to get completely out of control. Once I stopped taking the aspirin, I could finally breathe again.
We’re so so thankful for Michael’s parents and my parents who took care of the kids during my hospital stay. It certainly was not where I wanted to be, but it was necessary to figure out my breathing problems.
This was days before my biopsy. I already knew something could be wrong.
1 problem solved. Lots of problems waiting to be solved…
Due to the fact I’m carrying twins, my OB referred me to St. Ann’s Maternal Fetal Medicine Group. I saw them once in August and they confirmed the identical twin pregnancy, where the twins have their own sac but separate placentas, called a mo-di pregnancy. These appointments are very long, as they take about an hour to scan each baby and measure all the body parts.
On September 26, I went to another routine appointment to check on the babies. The scanning took almost 3 hours, so of course my instincts were telling me something was wrong. The ultrasound tech came back multiple times for multiple different views and pictures. Finally I met with the doctor in his office about the findings.
He was worried about the fluid levels of the babies. One big concern with twin pregnancies where the babies share a placenta is called Twin to Twin Transfusion Syndrome. He was worried that the very different amniotic fluid levels were the start of this syndrome. He considered us level 0, because the technical levels weren’t low enough for the diagnosis, but they were trending that way. He wanted to see me back in 3 days to check the levels again. If the levels continued to differ dramatically, we’d have to have inter uterine surgery in Cincinnati to correct the levels and save the babies.
This was also the appointment I found out the babies were girls! It so hard because minutes after I found out they were girls, I was hit with this news about their fluid levels. It certainly took the joy away of finding out I was carrying two little girls, because instantly the worrying started. I almost forgot to tell Michael we were having girls because I was so upset about the bad news.
All this happened 2 weeks before my cancer diagnosis. I had no idea things could get worse. In the meantime, our 2 little ones at home knew nothing of the worries that were going on in our minds.
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