Monday, October 14th, was the day of the diagnosis. I had met with a breast surgeon the week prior, the same day as my biopsy. She called with the news around dinner time. I was prepared, as I had already read through the findings on MyChart and googled every phrase that was used. I knew what she would say. Breast Cancer. You have breast cancer. The words almost didn’t hurt, like they weren’t meant for me, and were meant for someone else. Facing the reality that it was for me, that this was affecting my family, was still a long way off.

On Thursday, October 17th, we met with an oncologist. It went so fast. All my doctors talk about this cancer and say “if we take pregnancy out of it…” which of course is so infuriating. I’m not just pregnant, I’m pregnant with twins, and this pregnancy is not going smoothly. Doctors have to explain what they would do if I wasn’t pregnant, and then tell me how they will actually treat me.

My first day of chemo is already scheduled. Halloween of all days. Nothing spookier than that I suppose.